Life is too exhausting to spend it happy. I'm done trying. The universe is just far too creative for me to ever beat. Like, "How can I make this scissors fall off of this table at the least opportune time, and also make it open up in midair and land so perfectly that it pierces this can of pop and makes it spew itself all over the room?" creative. That actually happened once. Not today, but it did happen.
Today was just filled with "you can walk only on dog pee ice because we gotta make the front look nice" and "we made it as impossible as we could for you to get to the dumpsters, which was already bad because you had to walk through so much dog pee ice to get anywhere near them" and "your cat is still puking every day no matter how much you brush her" and "this Fun Dip that's supposed to change colors magically doesn't change colors at all" and "I'M NOT EVEN SUPPOSED TO BE WASTING TIME EATING SUGAR I NEED TO EAT A MILLION SODIUM HOW THE FUCK"
I HOPE THAT MAKES SOMEONE'S DAY BECAUSE IT'S NOT MAKING ANY OF MINE
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Two wrongs don't make a right, but three rights make a left.
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