The Strongest Matthew For Whenever Options

[Raijinili]

I write things that I don't believe in because they sound lovely.

[Raijinili]

Depression is back in full force again. How nice.

[Raijinili]

Ugh, that's never fun to deal with...

[Raijinili]

Just remember what the proctologist says: shit passes.
Get in touch if you need to talk.

[Raijinili]

STORY TIIME

I got a flu shot and a tetanus+pertussis shot on the same day in separate arms. The person who gave the flu shot took 10 actual seconds to give the stupid thing, so I was sitting there with a needle in my arm for 10 seconds wondering if she was even paying any attention to what she was doing. It proceeded to bruise and bleed. Actually bled a surprising amount... She told me that the tetanus shot hurts more, and I was prepared for 10 seconds of prolonged pain. But it was one of those automagical needle things, so it wasn't that long, and didn't hurt much at all. The next day, I whine about flu shot because having musclepains there in addition to being bruised there was pretty lame. Tetanus shot didn't seem to even exist.

The next day after that I wake up early in very great pain in the tetanusarm. I spoke loudly some of the phrases that appear in this video, but I also want you to know that telling you that is just an excuse to post the video. The thing looks like a big old bug bite now, and even itches like one. What kind of shot hibernates and then becomes terrible days later? And why do I have to deal with all of this just because of vaccinations? I mean jeez I already have to deal with the super autism from getting three different flu vaccines plus tetanus plus pertussis. Thanks, Obama.

I quit the tennis club because of armspain. It's not like we ever played tennis anyway...

[Raijinili]

After having my first experience with being drunk, I can see why people can develop alcohol addictions.

[Raijinili]

After having multiple experiences with various illegal substances and illegal uses of legal substances, I can see why people get addicted to things.

But alcohol, man. Whenever I tried to get drunk it was just like, screw it, this stuff tastes nasty and takes too long. So I don't understand...

[Raijinili]

Well, this wine I was drinking actually tastes okay so that helps. If you care about the taste, I don't think you'd want a white wine. Probably want something more reddish but not necessarily red. The wine I was drinking has a pinkish hue.

[Raijinili]

That makes sense to me because the one thing I did like was pinkish/reddish. I just need to get something that tastes alright aaand I could get drunk off of. I should do that one of these days.

Or... not? There are only two results to an adventure like that. Either I won't like being drunk and won't find it worthwhile, or I'll like being drunk and absolutely become an alcoholic. I don't even know how people stop having drug problems.

Also, I finally took a picture of the tag on my $100superrarebutnowforyouitisonly$2! "Pokemon Center Wooper Pokedoll" (it's cuter than all of this implies I promise).

» Click to show Spoiler - click again to hide... «

[Raijinili]

Sometimes I wish I could just detach myself from my emotions. I'd probably be better off that way instead of a miserable wreck at least 75% of the time.

[Raijinili]

I can't decide if numbness just feels numb, or if it feels incredibly itchy, or like a strange stinging.

[Raijinili]

It seems to be the pattern that following a couple of good weeks (or even days) comes some bad stuff. But, uh, still breathing:

Still no car (but still looking)

Still living alone w/o furniture or toaster (but maybe roommate in November?)

Still hate my student-loan-absorbing job (but will update resume when car)

Still trying to quit cigarettes (but am get better!)

Still no novel written (but November nears...!)

If I weren't so busy with DnD and drugs I would try to visit the channel more often.

[Raijinili]

Even though everyone always wants me to edit their things for free, I'm not qualified for any paid editing jobs because I don't have... an English degree. Yeah.

And speaking of drugs, I was trying this strange plant I found... I tried it in tea form before, and now as a candy. It still made me really cold, but I can definitely look at walls without being !!!. And if I think of anxious things, I get bored. Take THAT, anything else I've ever hoped to get anxiety relief from! Not a strong effect, but one that I think I can make use of. That tongue-numbing, though. I'm never not going to find that bizarre and confusing.

So I believe in kava now. But I don't believe in tea. Happy Halloween.

[Raijinili]

I'm taking classes again and quit my clothing retail job.

But now I own 16 pairs of shoes.

Someone save me

[Raijinili]

So I believe in kava now.

I've had good and bad experiences with kava. Most of the bad stemming from the awful flavor.

But I don't believe in tea.

Scoundrel.