 Jokes, Post some good ones |
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| Jan Akiyama |
 Dec 29 2005, 12:14 AM
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#1
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 Shy  Group: Arcs Posts: 40 Joined: 26-December 05 Member No.: 20  |
Three guys are stuck on a deserted island. They have no way off until they find a magic lamp. Since the genie grants only three wishes, they each get one wish. The first guy says he wants to go home. So he is sent home. The other says he wants to go with the other guy. So he is sent to join his friend. The last buy starts crying and says "I want my friends back!"
Ten people are stuck on a hanging rope. They soon find out that its gonna snap if one of them does not let go. After all of their bickering, one guy says he will let go of the rope. So he makes a long and touching farewell speech. After he is done everyone claps. A guy is off to buy a bull.He tells his sister thathe will send her a telegram when he gets it. He finds one but when he tries to send a telegram, he is told that the machine is broken and can only send one word telegrams. After a lot of debating, he decides to send the word "comfortable". The telegram dude asks why that word. The boy replies "My sister reads slowly. She will understand." ~~~ And I thought Saturos and Menardi had issues...- Sheba
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Replies(30 - 33)
| Chardes |
Jan 11 2006, 08:30 AM
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#31
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 Talkative Group: Arcs Posts: 105 Joined: 27-December 05 From: Void of stalking-ness. Member No.: 26 |
The only reason our head can't turn 180/360 degree's is so that we won't wring our own necks.
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| Swiyth |
Jan 14 2006, 05:04 PM
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#32
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 Vlayghn el Deistra Group: Arcs Posts: 223 Joined: 23-December 05 Member No.: 2 |
a rich man's son was involved in a very nasty accident.
after the accident, the son sat in a corner and started to whine "my car...my car....my beautiful car..." a doctor noticed his distressed state and went over to him and said "young man, maybe you should pay more attention to your arm" the rich man's son looked down on where his arm was supposed to be, then said "my Rolex!! my Rolex, oh my Rolex!!" ~~~ <SIENNA> Dude
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| Frisk |
Jul 6 2010, 12:22 AM
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#33
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 Determined Group: Knights Posts: 514 Joined: 8-June 07 From: Determined Member No.: 1463 |
Stephen Hawking- Best. Ventriloquist. Ever.
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| DustyHaru |
Jul 6 2010, 01:16 AM
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#34
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 Check Length Group: Knights Posts: 916 Joined: 7-August 07 From: Check Length Member No.: 1632 |
Vahn I only smiled after you posted.
When Albert Einstein was making the rounds of the speaker's circuit, he usually found himself eagerly longing to get back to his laboratory work. One night as they were driving to yet another rubber-chicken dinner, Einstein mentioned to his chauffeur (a man who somewhat resembled Einstein in looks & manner) that he was tired of speechmaking. "I have an idea, boss," his chauffeur said. "I've heard you give this speech so many times. I'll bet I could give it for you." Einstein laughed loudly and said, "Why not? Let's do it!" When they arrive at the dinner, Einstein donned the chauffeur's cap and jacket and sat in the back of the room. The chauffeur gave a beautiful rendition of Einstein's speech and even answered a few questions expertly. Then a supremely pompous professor ask an extremely esoteric question about anti-matter formation, digressing here and there to let everyone in the audience know that he was nobody's fool. Without missing a beat, the chauffeur fixed the professor with a steely stare and said, "Sir, the answer to that question is so simple that I will let my chauffeur, who is sitting in the back, answer it for me." This post has been edited by DustyHaru: Jul 6 2010, 01:17 AM |
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