Towards some blank infinity
Group: Knights
Posts: 1470
Joined: 12-February 06
From: Behind You
Member No.: 65
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O, everyone of the forum, I would like to present to you the religion I am converting to, Pastafatian. And I am spreading my message. Here is a quick overview of the religion and once you read, everything will make since and you can join to and spread the views of Pastafarians.
| QUOTE | The worlds began an invisible and undetectable Flying Spaghetti Monster created the universe, starting with a mountain, trees and a midgit. All evidence pointing toward evolution was intentionally planted by the Flying Spaghetti Monster. The FSM tests Pastafarians' faith by making things look older than they really are.
The first and original Pastafarians were Pirates. Their image as "thieves and outcasts" is all misinformation spread by Christian theologians of the Middle Ages. In reality, Pastafarianism says that they were "peace-loving explorers and spreaders of good will" who would distribute candy to children. "global warming, earthquakes, hurricanes, and other natural disasters are a direct effect of the shrinking numbers of pirates since the 1800s.â€
We have rules to, the 8 I rather you didn’t brought by Mosey the Pirate. There were 10, but he dropped two of them….. any way, follow these in life
1. I'd Really Rather You Didn't Act Like a Sanctimonious Holier-Than-Thou Ass When Describing My Noodly Goodness. If Some People Don't Believe In Me, That's Okay. Really, I'm Not That Vain. Besides, This Isn't About Them So Don't Change The Subject.
2. I'd Really Rather You Didn't Use My Existence As A Means To Oppress, Subjugate, Punish, Eviscerate, And/Or, You Know, Be Mean To Others. I Don't Require Sacrifices And Purity Is For Drinking Water, Not People.
3. I'd Really Rather You Didn't Judge People For The Way They Look, Or How They Dress, Or The Way They Talk, Or, Well, Just Play Nice, Okay? Oh, And Get This In Your Thick Heads: Woman = Person. Man = Person. Samey - Samey. One Is Not Better Than The Other, Unless We're Talking About Fashion And I'm Sorry, But I Gave That To Women And Some Guys Who Know The Difference Between Teal and Fuchsia.
4. I'd Really Rather You Didn't Indulge In Conduct That Offends Yourself, Or Your Willing, Consenting Partner Of Legal Age AND Mental Maturity. As For Anyone Who Might Object, I Think The Expression Is Go *bleep* Yourself, Unless They Find That Offensive In Which Case They Can Turn Off the TV For Once And Go For A Walk For A Change.
5. I'd Really Rather You Didn't Challenge The Bigoted, Misogynist, Hateful Ideas Of Others On An Empty Stomach. Eat, Then Go After The Bastard
6. I'd Really Rather You Didn't Build Multimillion-Dollar Churches/Temples/Mosques/Shrines To My Noodly Goodness When The Money Could Be Better Spent (Take Your Pick):
1. Ending Poverty
2. Curing Diseases
3. Living In Peace, Loving With Passion, And Lowering The Cost Of Cable
I Might be a Complex-Carbohydrate Omniscient Being, But I Enjoy The Simple Things In Life. I Ought To Know. I AM the Creator.
7. I'd Really Rather You Didn't Go Around Telling People I Talk To You. You're Not That Interesting. Get Over Yourself. And I Told You To Love Your Fellow Man, Can't You Take A Hint?
8. I'd Really Rather You Didn't Do Unto Others As You Would Have Them Do Unto You If You Are Into, Um, Stuff That Uses A Lot of Leather/Lubricant/Las Vegas. If the Other Person Is Into It, However (Pursuant To #4), Then Have At It, Take Pictures, And For The Love Of Mike, Wear a CONDOM! Honestly, It's A Piece of Rubber. If I Didn't Want It To Feel Good When You Did It I Would Have Added Spikes, Or Something. |
Now that you see my views, please join and discuss the great beliefs of the pastafarians together and try to fix the world.
Ramen.
~~~
[13:27:43] [Sabator] peter would be the worst batman ever though. "turn on the bat-signal" "right!" *turns on huge foglight, beams an image of striped pantsu into the sky*
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Pastafarians
Jul 20 2006, 12:28 AM
Chaos Seraph Pastafarians Jul 20 2006, 12:28 AM
